Papa-Paparazzi.

The other day while I waited in line to be cashed out at Walmart, I stumbled upon the magazine rack. Every time I am waiting in line, I always take a quick look to see what is going on in the "Celeb" world. As I look through, I notice that my favorite actress was faking a pregnancy, Lindsay Lohan is in jail, again, and my favorite celebrity couple is going through marrige "differences".

After reading all the juicy and personal details about the celebrities, I flip through the pages past the advertisements and the clothing of the year. I come to a stop at the section titled, "They are JUST like us!".

There, you see a picture of Justin Bieber getting pulled over, Lady Gaga tying her own shoe, and Taylor Swift steeping out of her front door. Oh. Em. Gee. They are just like us?!? That's absurd! After you get over how "they" are just normal people, you see pictures of Jennifer Aniston through her front window, making coffee.

As I stood in the middle of a check out line, looking at the celebrities only one thing crossed my mind.
"What would happen if paparazzi was taking pictures through my front window? What if TMZ really saw what happened in the four walls that keep me safe?"

That would be a problem.

I could see it now. My family would make the front page of every magazine in the check out line. People would be wondering why my little sister was standing on top of a table, beating on her chest like a monkey. Or, why my dad was running around the house screaming.

The article about us would be long, maybe a four pager. People would look at pictures of us all laying on the living room floor wrestling, or playing a heated game of Monopoly. They would be amused by the pictures of us all throwing pillows at each other, or how my little sister is on top of me. The next page would be about how my dog would rather have a treat over sitting and staying. Under that would be a picture of my dad chasing my sister and I around the dinner table with a spatula. People would laugh at our embarrassing pictures.

TMZ would make a fortune just on one family, alone. They would already have titles picked out for the articles to come such as, "The family who clearly has issues.". Or, "You thought your family was weird? Read this article!"

Readers would be amused by the pictures of me dancing and singing around the house. Or, the occasional "attempt" of the worm by my dad.

After thinking about this, I will no longer be looking at the "They are JUST like us!" page. I will keep my head down, and just nonchalantly pass my mom the groceries. I am glad I am not famous.